Writing Dialogue
Many branching scenarios include dialogue, partly because simulated conversations are great topics for this format. That means when you write a branching scenario, you often need to write dialogue.
Show, Don’t Tell
Try to avoid using an omniscient narrator who describes everything that happens or what the characters are like. As much as possible, show learners what’s happening through dialogue or character actions. You might need a little introduction to quickly set the context for a scenario (after all, you don’t have the length of a novel to build your setting), but aim for a more conversational approach within the scenario itself.
“Telling” example – draft
Mollie is a senior call center tech. She has good troubleshooting skills, but she gets impatient and sometimes too short with customers when she feels their requests are unreasonable. Jason needs to review a recent call where Mollie spoke with a customer, Jim, and provide feedback to Mollie.
“Showing” example – revised
Jason says, “Let’s listen to the recording of one of your recent calls to review it together.” Mollie shifts in her seat uncomfortably while Jason starts playing the call recording.
On the recording, Mollie says, “Hello! Thank you for calling TaxFlow, where we help you get your maximum refund! How can I help you today?”
“Yeah, I’m hoping you can actually help me, because the last two times I called, they didn’t even fix the problem!” Jim replies.
“Oh no! I’m sorry to hear that. What seems to be the problem?”
“Well, I started working on my taxes, but your stupid software doesn’t even have the data from my W2!”
Mollie pauses for a moment before responding. “You were…expecting the software to enter your data for you?” she says, incredulously.
“Exactly! I paid for this software because it’s supposed to make everything easy for me!” Jim says.
Mollie snorts. “Well, it does make it pretty easy, but it can’t magically enter your data for you. You still have to have your W2 to type the numbers in.”
“Well then, why did I even pay for this stupid program?” Jim yells.
Mollie shouts back sarcastically, “Because apparently you’re too stupid to understand the basics of how this works! If you just enter your W2 data yourself, TaxFlow does pretty much everything else! But, no, you need someone to hold your hand and do it for you.”
“What did you just say?!? Are you kidding me? Oh, I have HAD it with you people!” Jim hangs up the phone.
Comparing the two versions
Which version is more interesting? Which version gets your attention and holds your engagement more? These two versions essentially tell the same story, but in two very different ways. Not every scenario will have something as emotionally intense as this shouting match between Mollie and Jim, but you may show anxiety, boredom, frustration, enthusiasm, or other emotions. Even without pictures of these characters, you can craft a more interesting story by showing what’s happening between two characters rather than just describing it with a narrator.
Quotation marks
Cathy Moore suggests that putting dialogue in quotation marks makes scenarios more effective.
This trick helps ban the bureaucratic from your writing. Instead of paraphrasing what people say, stick it in quotation marks and it will magically rewrite itself.
…
The minute you put your dry prose in quotes, you realize how very dry it is. Then it becomes easy to make it sound more natural. This trick also moves you from boring “telling” to more vivid “showing.”
Cathy Moore
See Cathy’s example of rewriting from a paraphrase to dialogue in her post.
Contractions
When real people speak, they use contractions. In fact, avoiding contractions is how Hollywood writers signal that a character is an alien or a robot rather than a real person.
I often find that I need more contractions than “looks right” to me on the page for it to really sound conversational, especially for scenarios using voice over or video. My process is to write my draft and then go back through to add contractions during revisions. I know I have to make a conscious effort to add contractions.
Contractions are also related to the “personalization principle” from Clark and Mayer’s research. Informal language (including contractions) can increase the impact your courses have on learners. Learners tend to engage more with elearning that sounds like a real person, and real people use contractions when they speak.
Conversational tone
A conversational tone may be less formal than you’re used to writing for elearning. You may need to write a first draft, then go back to make it less formal.
Don’t be afraid to include interjections and transition words like “well,” “so,” “ugh,” “um,” and “oops.” Dialogue that omits all of those little words can feel just a little “off” and formal.
If you’re not sure if it sounds conversational or not, read your dialogue aloud. Can you imagine a real person saying that? If not, go back and tweak it.